I’m Back and In Full Effect!

Hey Hey Hey! I am back!!! I know it’s been quite some time since I have written an entry. My page was set to private and I needed to take some time and regroup. But I am back y’all!! <— noticed my southern twang?

Life has changed so much since my last entry. Texas is still good, changed jobs and got promoted, meet some really great folks here and my son left for the military. Some things, however, were not so good. Lost relationships with my two sisters due to a major misunderstanding from something I wrote on my blog that they most definitely misinterpreted. Ended a friendship/sisterhood with another woman who I grew close to and referred to as a sister around the same time, got into a car accident, health issues, ended a relationship with someone I started seeing. Work began piling up, work place drama, you name it! All in 1 year! It was a rough moment and this is simply the surface of it all. I will dive deeper as the time comes. But for now, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger! I truly relate to the Phoenix rising from the ashes!

I learned so many valuable lessons in 2018 but the most important one was to be ok with how awesome and amazing I am despite who it threatens and makes uncomfortable. The right people will love all the things others were threatened by. Stand firm in who you are, stand in your truth, act with integrity and above all else, lead with love.

I almost allowed others commitment of misunderstanding me to stop me from something I held so dear. I am V. It took me some time, but I realized that I have put a lot of work into this and this has truly served as an outlet to be free and creative and no one should make me feel as if I can not be and live in my truth because it makes them uncomfortable. That was not, is not and will not be my burden to bear.

So, hello WordPress Fam! Happy New Year and I look forward to reconnecting with all of you again! There is so much more to come!

In love,

V.

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3AM Madness

3am

2:58am

…and I’m thinking of you

Thinking of the possibilities, maybe

I really want to do things right

Afraid of doing something wrong

Reading these books so I don’t fuck it up this time

Finding out that the “rules” are making me insane

3:09am

Obsessing if I am pushing you away rather than drawing you near

I’m obsessing over wanting things to work because I think I like you

Yet not really giving myself a full chance to allow myself to even know if it’s you I want!

3:21am

Overanalyzing is truly bad for the soul

Realizing maybe these books aren’t really helping,

Like to text or not to text?

To act uninterested or shy?

“Don’t call him, let him call you?”

“Play hard to get! Then you get him” kind of books.

Bullshit.

3:45am

I’m seeing that at the right time, and the right man. No matter the circumstance

It will work out… Well unless you start whoring yourself or make it to easy. Wait!

3:00am madness. 

Can’t even finish a positive damn thought without feeding into the poison.

Maybe I should just sleep.

3:59am.

-V.

 

#writing101

Man Down

In less than 100 words.. Here is a different perspective… #writing101

IMG_0177

***

I watch you from afar

You’re spiraling out of control

I no longer recognize who you are

I no longer see the person I used to know

You are drowning in your despair

And refuse to see the light

Not allowing those close to care

Simply giving up the fight

 

He wakes up this morning and stares at the ceiling.  Wondering when things got so bad. He used to think he was on top of the world. Now he sits with the weight of the world on his shoulders. So he pulls out a lighter and begins to numb the pain

 

-V.