“Who is filling your cup?” Someone asked me this very question recently. I paused when I heard this, because honestly I did not know the answer to that particular question. But it made me think. And that was the intention of this person. Force me to think. To think about my patterns, what I attract, and what energy I give off. “Who is filling your cup?” was a loaded question that needed to be asked.
Now I will say that I have been blessed tremendously in the past few months and everything I asked for I received and more! But yet, I sat and found myself feeling…. empty. You may say, but your cup should have been running over! And it was, but I did what I do best, I poured into other people’s cup. And that’s not a bad thing, but the issue that occurred in doing that, is I poured into cups that I had to supply. I had to supply the cup and then pour into it. Why was I attracting this type of person? Instead of placing the blame on them, I looked inwards. Why did they feel comfortable enough to ask me to give? Why did I feel bad for asking for the same in return from these very same people? Why do I find potential mates in men who were ‘dames’ in distress and why do I feel apt to want to help out of the goodness of my heart? The foolishness of my heart. With all that said. I had to stop. Pause. This is a pattern. It almost happened again today!
I caught myself and I stopped and I said to myself, “My cup is not just a cup, it’s fine china. I will not use it everyday for any old guest, you have to special.” To some, this may seem cold, and I do not intend to come off standoffish, but if I don’t protect me, who will? I looked back at the last few men that I have dated and it was the same pattern. I poured into their cups and when I needed my cup filled, they never had enough to give. I will let that be. Thats a whole other blog post! LOL
With that being said, I am so grateful to my friend who listened to me and poured knowledge onto me. I truly appreciate those who can make me think and force me to look within. She truly poured into my cup and today, my cup runneth over.